Inferiority complex: a real suffering

---

Extract from the article: Less beautiful, less intelligent, more cowardly - some people always feel inferior to others, and they suffer for it. Whether it's based on a real fault or a supposed fault, the inferiority complex is a source of great suffering. Where does this feel

---

Less beautiful, less intelligent, more cowardly - some people always feel inferior to others, and they suffer for it. Whether it's based on a real fault or a supposed fault, the inferiority complex is a source of great suffering. Where does this feeling of inferiority come from? How can it be overcome?

The complex is defined as a set of preoccupations centred on a real or supposed defect (physical, intellectual or psychological). This complex can make us feel inferior. For example, you may suffer from an inferiority complex if you are shorter than most people, if you are bald or if you have protruding ears (the person suffering from such a complex tries to hide the part of their body that they don't like, by wearing heels or a wig or even hats, for example), but you can also feel intellectually inferior. This is the case of the person who doesn't want to speak up in a meeting because they feel stupid compared to the others and are afraid that they'll think they're stupid, or because of a supposed physical defect that doesn't exist. This is known as dysmorphophobia.

Behind the psychological inferiority complex "I'm rubbish" lie problems of self-esteem, with overestimation of others (seen as more beautiful, more intelligent, more courageous...).

These are feelings of self-deprecation buried in the unconscious. The consequences of this inferiority complex are numerous: withdrawal, social fear (phobia), anxiety, psychomotor retardation and even depression.  The suffering associated with complexes is enormous. What's more, it is often underestimated by those around us.

Causes

Lack of self-confidence, the source of the inferiority complex, can have several origins. Childhood can play a role. Having an intimidating father or mother, for example, can have an influence, as can growing up in a so-called "toxic" family who put you down or emphasised one of your physical defects... To this we should add the influence of the school playground: you can develop a complex there, especially if you are a child who lacks self-confidence.

Finally, a flawless society reinforces complexes. Inferiority complexes often develop in people who are perfectionists.

How do you get rid of it?

The best way to overcome an inferiority complex is to work on your self-esteem, to learn how to respond to the reassuring little voice inside you that tells you that you're ugly or no good.Cognitive behavioural therapies (CBT) are the best way to regain your self-confidence.

Some advice from CBT if you suffer from an inferiority complex: First of all, you need to understand the causes of your complex.Accept your weaknesses and put the defect into context (for example: I hate my nose, but what do I like about my looks?) Defocus: human beings are a collection of things (a physique, an intellect, but also human relationships, etc.). Reduce perfectionism: if you're a perfectionist, you often have complexes. Accept your body shape: get dressed, don't try to hide your complex, talk to others about it straight away.Assert yourself with others: say what you have to say, even if you think it's silly.Ask those around you about your qualities and faults, so that you can work on what you can work on and highlight your strengths and abilities.

William O.

Article validated by Dr Zinsou Selom Degboe, Clinical Psychologist/Psychotherapist at the Department of Psychiatry and Medical Psychology (SPPM), Addiction Specialist at CHU Campus (Lomé)